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'Poem for a gargoyle'


 
 

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Click For MoreDocument 8 out of 20 by Marijke Mahieu.

SciFi and Fantasy Stories: Poem for a gargoyle

A rather sad and gloomy poem for my doing...but a poem nonetheless! ;)
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Poem for a Gargoyle

Tonight once more fair moon will be pregnant,
heavy medal in my blood crimson sky.
The scent of the air invites for a hunt,
so I stretch my paws and prepare to fly.

Very old am I, bones stiff with cold.
Grey rock is my soul, creature carved from stone.
None see the splendor as my wings unfold.
High above I sit, but always alone.

Claws grip to the ledge, fear of letting go.
Stone mind is trying hard to recall,
as my eyes gaze to the houses below,
the last flight that made me leave my safe wall.

Once I was fearless, young rock very bold,
for each moon teased me from my base
and the spell could not keep its hold
when Luna called me forth to chase.

But now I fear that this might be the last
of many adventures beneath black skies.
for the same rock that formed me in the past,
now holds me fast with ancient stone ties.

The top of this cathedral I must ward.
It is my purpose, my life, my doom.
The sculpture must once more be restored.
Grey will be the color of my tomb.

Soon no more life will flow through these cold wings,
for they will be one with the rock below
and I will have become a solid thing.
My mind will stop, I will no longer know.

But in this crimson night I’ll fly once more,
before the inevitable comes to be.
For the last time above the roofs I’ll soar
and treasure the joy of being free.

 
 

   © Marijke Mahieu. All rights reserved!

DateNameComment 
14 Feb 2006:-) Deborah Cullins-Smith
Beautiful imagery in your words! I think this is my favorite -- thus far, at any rate.... I'll have to come back later to read more. This is beautifully crafted, Marijke. Hmmmm.... I just noticed -- the moon outside my window is FULL.... And I think I see...... no, can't be. Must be my overactive imagination! *smile*

23 Marijke Mahieu replies: "Hehe. Who knows? But alas, this gargoyle was down to his last flight so I don't think you'll see him at your window anytime soon. I know this poem is far from perfect, but I like the rustic feeling is has. I'm glad other people find it enjoyable too! If you're interested in poetry, then maybe read "The song of lady Cyn'ya" if you're thinking about reading more of my writings. It was my first real poem and I'm still extremely pleased with how it came out, even more than with this one 12 But no pressure! Just if you're looking for something else to read. Thank you for your comment!"
18 Feb 2006:-) Stephanie R. Schauer
Wow, what more is there to say? Makes my own writing meagre in contrast. Really lovely. *sighs in longing* such talent!

28 Marijke Mahieu replies: "I'm sure that's not true! And there really isn't much to writing poetry. You need a suitable mood, a vague idea of what you're going to write about and a good online rhyming dictionary 12 The thing I know I need to work on, though, is rhyme scheme so that's the first thing I'm going to try and improve. And I also think it's the hardest thing to rhyming. So, give it a go...and then judge for yourself 12"
5 May 200645 Brian Rich
This was quite imaginative. Your use of personification is excellent (pregnant moon, the moon teased him etc.) The real emotional impact of this is that he is aware of his fate and has time for one more flight. It wasn't that he just became a statue but his awareness of what was to be is what really hits home. You make wonderful art with words, Marijke.

23 Marijke Mahieu replies: "Thank you so much, Brian! I'm very insecure what poetry is concerned so it's always nice to hear an encouraging word now and again. I know I'm not much of a rhymer so I'm also glad to know the other style tricks (like personification) come across well. Thanks for reading and commenting! 2"
11 May 200645 L. Shanra Kuepers
for the same <- nitpicky, I know, but I think you want a capital 'f' there. ^-^;

Awwwwwwwwwww... That's such a sad, sad piece. Gorgeous, though. The melancholy of this piece comes across wonderfully. It had a very solemn and old, reverent feel to it that definitely fitted the subject matter.

This was just a beautiful, tragic little piece. You've a wonderful flair for poetry. ^-^

23 Marijke Mahieu replies: "Argh! I missed that one! Unbelievable 2 And I am very flattered by your words. They mean a lot to me since I'm always extremely insecure when it comes to poetry. You should know how much "nagging" it took for me to start putting poetry on here in the first place 2"
8 Jul 2006:-) Jason Wade Spittler
Marijke, Marijke, Marijke...What are we going to do with you my dear? This is a truly fascinating look at the life of the classic "architectural" gargoyles. Having the presence of mind to place it at a point in its life where old age is taking it--and it fears what it no longer certain in its enfeebled mind--is an excellent portrayal of the condition of your gargoyle. It shows us its age, and hints at what is to come for it as the short time it has left comes to an end.

In a very humanizing way, it fears what we fear, the onset of death. But what I like the best is the fact that it acknowledges this, and does not let it keep itself down. It takes to the sky once more--perhaps for the last time--to embrace the enrapturing joy that comes with one of those great and wondrous things that most of us take for granted...

Freedom

23 Marijke Mahieu replies: "What? What did I do? 14 You know, writing about an "old" gargoyle wasn't all that hard...if you see them sitting up there, worn by the wind and the rain it's easy to imagine how they must "feel"...all alone and tired...so that's how this poem came to be! I know it's a bit sad, but I hope people see what you read in it: acceptance of what is going to be. We all die one day, even gargoyles! 2 Thanks for reading and commenting, Jason! 2"
8 Mar 2007:-) Jon Midget
A very nice poem. I didn't even realize you had a rhyme scheme until a few stanzas down (That's good, by the way. Rhymes work best when the words and phraseology feels completely natural).

And as for you comment that you need to work on the meter — rubbish! I can't think of a single reason a tired, worn out gargoyle on the verge of committing the rest of its existence to statue-hood would bounce his thoughts around in some kind of iambic frolic. He's tired. He's trying to enjoy one last flight. He's not going to worry about strict form.

I enjoyed the poem quite a bit. My one suggestion is to include more senses. There's a lot of visual imagery, but what about the scents, the feel, and the sounds of a crumbling stone figure? A bit of time devoted to these senses may bring out the isolation and cold loneliness even more.

Nice work.

22 Marijke Mahieu replies: "Woaw, now that's a nice comment to get! Someone actually thought about this poem and the (lack of) metre...And I found your explanation very believable! 2 Good idea to include more senses, though! I still quite enjoy the idea behind this poem and might rework it someday to make it just that bit better. Thank you so much for your input!"
21 Apr 2007:-) Samantha E. Fortie
I really like this poem. It has a nice rythm and the stanzas are well broken up. That poor gargoyle, makes you wish you could save him. I wish that I could write poems as well as you do. I still need a lot of work.

:-) Marijke Mahieu replies: "Thank your for your nice comment!"
3 Jul 2007:-) Annika Olani
Hi there! I just love this poem, sure it is a bit gloomy but also hopeful. That in the end be able to do what you love one last time!
Best wishes Annika =0)

:-) Marijke Mahieu replies: "Yes, it IS bittersweet! 12"
3 Feb 200845 Anoynymous
that woz amazing really cool it had nice ryythm best wishes bye

:-) Marijke Mahieu replies: "Thank you!"
4 Oct 200845 Mark Williams
WHere is this Gargoyle in the photo located?

:-) Marijke Mahieu replies: "The picture was taken somewhere in France, but I’m sorry to say I can’t really remember where exactly now!"
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